Not giving in to fear.

I had a discussion with a fellow blogging friend of mine a while ago in which we observed that I have a tendency to write when I'm wound up.

Well, sorry folks...today is no exception.

I won't go into too much detail because, for a start I don't have all of them and secondly, I want to protect my daughter.

But suffice to say that today my seven year old daughter learned first hand what it's like to be harassed for nothing more than her existence. No, not by her peers, if they were her peers she probably would have stood up for herself with all her usual feistiness. 

No, these were teenagers boys.

Did I mention that she is seven?

They used words that she didn't understand. She couldn't repeat it to me because she is innocent enough not to comprehend what was said. But she knew that it hurt, that she felt intimidated and unsafe...and that they deliberately targeted her.

It's hard to explain the mix of emotions I felt to see her so upset.
Rage was pretty foremost. Someone scared my beautiful strong girl.
Helplessness followed pretty quickly...I wondered how on earth I could get a handle on this without completely overreacting. I became very conscious that I wanted to protect her. Of course, surely that's every mother's instinct. But what I wasn't prepared for was the anger I felt when I found myself contemplating the measures necessary to keep her away from this scenario again. Making immediate changes to her routine seemed a pretty quick solution. 

Then I realised...I'm validating her fear.

I'm teaching her it is her responsibility to change herself in this situation...and worse, I'm not dealing with their behaviour, not making them accountable for what I consider to be appalling behaviour on the streets of my town in broad daylight!

This is not her fault. 

So I'm going to teach my beautiful girl that these voices don't matter. That she can hold her head up high and sail on past without a care because she is safe in the knowledge that she is loved. My only hope is that together she and I can find in her inner strength that will block out the voices.

To the parents of those boys, I hope that when you find out about this, and I fully intend that you will, I hope your immediate reaction is horror that your child would do such a thing and that it sets off a chain of events that will lead them to grow into intelligent, empathetic, young men.

That is my sincerest hope.